Are you in a Toxic Relationship?

A dysfunctional relationship that leads to suicide
Photo credit: http://www.meaww.com

Before we even start discussing why you are still holding on to that person, it’s necessary to refresh our minds on what a toxic relationship is. You might at the end realise you are just going through a difficult time, because no relationship is perfect. Therefore do not jump to conclusions too fast.

A toxic relationship is basically one that constantly drains you. http://www.psychologytoday.com says it is one that is unfavourable to you or to others. This means, at least one person is unhappy because of how they’re treated. I talked with some friends and family members who had a lot to say about toxic relationships. This is what I gathered:

  1. I can’t be myself around him
  2. She’s not supportive of my dreams
  3. He always makes me feel like I am worth a cent and no one will take me if he left me
  4. When I need her she’s never around, meanwhile I am always there for her
  5. They never show concern about what is happening to me, all they care about is themselves
  6. He wants to shape me into an imaginary perfect person
  7. She wants me to live her dreams, damn I just want to do my thing
  8. We keep on fighting about everything
  9. She doesn’t trust me
  10. I am never enough no matter what I do
  11. We don’t communicate
  12. I am always trying to please him
  13. She has hurt me multiple times and keep promising she’ll change
  14. He disrespects me anytime he can
  15. There is no good news, non stop issues and I can’t do this anymore
  16. I decided to jeopardise my life to help him
  17. I give everytime and get nothing in return
  18. She threatens to hurt herself when we have a problem
  19. I purposely make him jealous to get a reaction
  20. I stopped talking to my friends and family for him
  21. He can’t stand my success
  22. I don’t feel comfortable with him, sometimes I have to lie because I can’t tell him exactly how I feel
  23. She’s always blaming me
  24. He buys me gifts to ask for forgiveness and I always fall for it
  25. They’re ashamed of who I am and what I do

So much about toxic relationships and even more. You don’t have to keep on hurting. If it’s not working, talk about it. You both or all deserve to be happy, even if it means putting an end to the relationship. Some people are just not meant to stay together. “Toxic partners, friends and family members.” They are here for a time, to make us mature for example. Life is too short to hold on to a person that will cause your downfall. Let go!

If they are willing but don’t know how to love you, are you teaching them how to ? Do they get it ? Is the love you want to receive detrimental to them in any kind of way ? Could you be part of the problem ? Let them go!

Sometimes we stay because we lack self-love.

Vanick Kam
This is a genius description of; you love others fully when you love yourself fully.
Image by: files.brightside.me

Once you escape from a toxic relationship you might still be traumatised for a long time. You might not let anybody else love you, because you don’t trust anymore or you don’t think you deserve to be loved. Learn how to love yourself. It is the second step to healing. Speaking from personal experience.

Nonetheless, like I said, do not give up on someone with whom you’re just going through a rough time. It doesn’t happen everyday. If you walk hand in hand and do not constantly live the same issues that were solved before, then you’re not in a toxic relationship.

6 thoughts on “Are you in a Toxic Relationship?

  1. Thanks dear 😘
    Many People live in toxic relations but do not have enough love for themselves to quit. I retain From this interesting article : love yourself fully inorder to love others fully.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I really appreciate your view about the toxic relationships.I also had one which is related to your article more likely.But self respect and love awaken me and finally I found a man who loves me for who I am. Every children should be taught from their childhood about self awareness by their parents so that they grow up confident and make less mistakes in choosing a life partner.Keep up the good work Ms.Vanick.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Belle article, quelle pureté dans l écriture si nous tous pourrions comprendre cela le monde sera plus beau mais es ce que ces relations ne nous donnes pas du recule pour aimer d autre plus fort ?

    Liked by 1 person

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